Typically, I like to spew out a reasonable summary of the events of the year, and there's been plenty to talk about...An Election Year, the Glenn Beck Rally, the Rally for Sanity, Palin, Obama, the KFC scholarship, Jesus' Worst fans, another year of fun-yet-scary media debauchery, the list goes on....BUT, this being a close-of-the-decade year I decided to do something a bit different and give a more brief and personal send-off to 2010.
First, if you don't have plans tonight, and live in Pittsburgh, consider coming down to Papa J's for their New Year's Eve bash. I'll be doing jokes for a bit along with a few other locals followed by music via DJ for the remainder of the evening...That being said this is the first-time for me, not just in comedy but in my life, having a NYE gig of any sorts, which is kind of particular I suppose. I had an offer in '08, but that year I did a show on Thanksgiving, so the girlfriend asked me to promise there would be no NYE gig, to which I obliged.
Overall this year has been a pretty solid one for me in terms of comedy and career, so I'd like to thank everybody who has shown their support in any and every way, whether it be coming out to the gigs, booking me, letting me open for you, sharing advice I actually asked for, talking shop, listening to me rant when things go lousy without throwing a foreign object, or even having a few drinks with me to cope with gig cancellations, for the sake of time and space I'm not going to be too particular but you all know who are, thank you a million times over, it means the world and then some.
Thank you to everyone that made this year's Holiday Ha-Ha a great one. We had over 100 in attendance, and featured sketch and a music ending for the first time ever. To all the comics who dedicated their time and effort and all of those who came out, thank you for making it a memorable one.
Right before I left my house to head down to Club Cafe, I was perusing through Facebook, mainly to cope with being nervous, and I noticed the profile of my old roommate Kimmie from when I lived in Nashville. I realized I hadn't heard from her in awhile and decided to do a profile-check to see what she was up to. I found out that Kimmie passed away. Kimmie and I were roommates for around three months, and although we only crossed paths for a short time in both of our lives we stayed in touch fairly regularly. Kimmie's husband is a trucker, so she would move around often, but I'd usually hear from her via e-mail every so often and usually I'd get a phone call from a number and an area code I didn't recognize whatsoever, to be pleasantly surprised that it was Kimmie's new number and she was living somewhere new and enjoying it, or in some cases looking to leave and head elsewhere. She was a true free spirit but more importantly one of the most genuine people I had ever met. We lived in a Youth Hostel, and Kimmie made pretty much everybody passing through feel right at home by introducing everybody and more often than not preparing a meal for them. She did this out of her own generosity, she was never formerly hired by the place to do any of this, and to my knowledge she never received any financial compensation of any sorts, she just genuinely loved travelers and loved to have a good time and wanted to share that with others. Kimmie was always very encouraging of me at a time when I didn't have a clue what I should've been doing, and when I told Kimmie that I had started doing stand-up she was very encouraging, and told me that that seemed to be a perfect fit and she couldn't wait to see me live. Thus far in my lifetime, I can honestly say people like her are rare, and I'm lucky and honored for her friendship...I'll miss you Kimmie, have a good time on the other side. --Ron
Well, so much for the "brief" part of this post, all-in-all, 2010's been a great ride, and here's to 2011. All the best.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Holiday Ha-Ha! ONE WEEK!!!
Just a cordial reminder that this year's Holiday Ha-Ha Comedy Show is happening one week from today!!! December 29, 7pm, Club Cafe, Pittsburgh, PA. The show will feature sketch, stand-up, out-of-town guests and perhaps even a musical number or two. I think I speak for all of the comics involved when I say that we are very excited about this show. Tickets are still available and they are $5 in advance, $7 at the door. Any questions feel free to contact me. I sincerely hope to see you all there! Last but certainly not least, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
The Ultimate Hell Gig
It was an all-day festival, middle of summer in Pennsylvania about 20 minutes outside of Pittsburgh at a large fair ground. They never tried anything like this before, the entertainment was to be all comedy, beginning at 10:30am and ending at 6:00pm. The booker called all of us participating into a meeting the night before and she gave us our slots. I was given the 4:00 slot and was to do 30 minutes. There were two people after me. All of the comics on the show, including myself, were pretty much at the same level in terms of work we were getting and how far along we were on the ladder. To put it more bluntly and in comedian terms, no headliner/TV credits on this show. I usually don't let this kind of stuff get to me but one of the people after me happened to be a comic I didn't care for very much. Not only his act but as a human being I thought he needed kicked in the throat a couple of times. I was pissed he was after me as the boooker seemed to have given us our slots based on her perception of our skill.
The next day, I showed up at 10:00am as that was check-in time. The booker approached me, "Ron, I was kind of hoping you'd do the warm-up in addition to your slot, you need to be on at 10:30am, that cool?" I said sure. I figured I just had to introduce the event, thank people for coming, ummm, in a situation like this should one tell people to silence their cell phones? I figured I had a few minutes to decide. As I was about to go on stage the booker approached me again. "Ok, so go until about noon." "What?" "Go until about noon." "That's an hour-and-a-half, that's an awfully long time for a stand-up, it takes years and years for people to develop a full hour-and-a-half they can do all at once." "Well, you're not allowed to do any of your material, so that's fine." "What?" "Your 4:00pm slot is for your material, this 10:30am-noon slot is for crowd work only. You said you would do it, if you back out that's fine but I wouldn't bother contacting me for dates in 2011." I didn't want to lose a year's worth of dates from a booker I worked for regularly, so I sucked it up and went on stage. The stage was about 10 feet from the ground. The closest audience member was a solid 20 yards at least away from me. An hour-and-a-half of crowd work. I greeted the crowd, backs were turned, reverb from the microphone, somebody coughed. A couple children were playing in the fields a ways off. I was mostly ignored. I turned to the sound guy and asked if the booker was still around. "Nope, she left." I bailed. I didn't know what time it was, but I bailed. I told the people the comedy would start back up at noon and I'd be on at 4 and to stick around. A couple people clapped. I took the subway back into the city and went to my apartment. My girlfriend was just waking up and asked me why I was home. "It's going to be a long day, are you coming to the show?" "I wasn't planning on it." "Well, you won't be missing much, when it's over, I'm going to need a drink." "What's your slot?" "4." "I'm surprised you're not closing out of that bunch." "Whatever, we all get paid the same I think."
I returned to the grounds and nobody seemed to have cared that I bailed on my hour-and-a-half of crowd work. I saw the comic I didn't care for that was going on after me. "I'm pumped I'm closing this, it pays twice of what the rest of you guys are making, isn't that weird? I mean, I do the same amount of time, but I get paid twice as much, dude, maybe she'll let you close next year." What a dick. I try not to be petty when it comes to stuff like that and of course jealously gets one nowhere, but this guy's just a flat out chode. I agreed with him that it was odd and walked away. It wasn't worth it to retaliate, why stoop to his level? I waited around for a few hours, bought some candy, the crowd seldom paid attention to any of the comics. At one point a water-gun fight broke out. Later, a couple started making out near the stage and the dude went right up the girl's shirt in front of everybody. At about 3:45 I started to get closer to the stage. Just then I noticed my parents had arrived. "We saw this in the paper, saw you were on it, thought we'd get out of town for an afternoon, how's it going?" "Eh, to be honest, I'm not looking forward to this, sometimes it really feels like a job, this is one of those times." "When are you going on?" "4." Brief moment of silence.
Then my dad piped up, "wow, it's pathetic you're not closing this shit." "What?" "Seriously, that guy (comic I don't like) is a total hack, I'm pretty sure he stole his closer from CK, he sucks." "I agree." "Yet he's closing the show and you're not. Seriously, it's pathetic." "It's one booker's opinion." "It's pretty sad Ron, we need to get going actually, we're going to miss your set." "You just got here." "Yeah, I forgot we have stuff to do." Unbelievable. So what if one booker thinks I shouldn't be closing the show? I can't let this crap get to me, especially not now. As I'm trapped in thought I get a tap on the shoulder, it's the MC, "hey man, I need your intro." I looked towards the stage and the comedian on stage was humping the stole with three people watching and laughing and applauding and the rest of the audience still had their backs turned.
I woke up. I was thirsty. Yup, friends, it was a dream. There is no subway in or around Pittsburgh, that's the kicker. Not to mention I don't think either of my parents are familiar with the term "closing" in terms of it being used as comedy-lingo near synonymous but not quite with "headlining." Although, to all my comedy friends out there, I'm a bit disturbed at how possible that dream could actually be. Oh, and neither the comic I didn't like nor the booker were actual people, all sole residents of my subconscious, though I guess if they were people I probably wouldn't divulge their identity anyway. If you need me I'll be at the park doing 90 minutes of crowd work.
The next day, I showed up at 10:00am as that was check-in time. The booker approached me, "Ron, I was kind of hoping you'd do the warm-up in addition to your slot, you need to be on at 10:30am, that cool?" I said sure. I figured I just had to introduce the event, thank people for coming, ummm, in a situation like this should one tell people to silence their cell phones? I figured I had a few minutes to decide. As I was about to go on stage the booker approached me again. "Ok, so go until about noon." "What?" "Go until about noon." "That's an hour-and-a-half, that's an awfully long time for a stand-up, it takes years and years for people to develop a full hour-and-a-half they can do all at once." "Well, you're not allowed to do any of your material, so that's fine." "What?" "Your 4:00pm slot is for your material, this 10:30am-noon slot is for crowd work only. You said you would do it, if you back out that's fine but I wouldn't bother contacting me for dates in 2011." I didn't want to lose a year's worth of dates from a booker I worked for regularly, so I sucked it up and went on stage. The stage was about 10 feet from the ground. The closest audience member was a solid 20 yards at least away from me. An hour-and-a-half of crowd work. I greeted the crowd, backs were turned, reverb from the microphone, somebody coughed. A couple children were playing in the fields a ways off. I was mostly ignored. I turned to the sound guy and asked if the booker was still around. "Nope, she left." I bailed. I didn't know what time it was, but I bailed. I told the people the comedy would start back up at noon and I'd be on at 4 and to stick around. A couple people clapped. I took the subway back into the city and went to my apartment. My girlfriend was just waking up and asked me why I was home. "It's going to be a long day, are you coming to the show?" "I wasn't planning on it." "Well, you won't be missing much, when it's over, I'm going to need a drink." "What's your slot?" "4." "I'm surprised you're not closing out of that bunch." "Whatever, we all get paid the same I think."
I returned to the grounds and nobody seemed to have cared that I bailed on my hour-and-a-half of crowd work. I saw the comic I didn't care for that was going on after me. "I'm pumped I'm closing this, it pays twice of what the rest of you guys are making, isn't that weird? I mean, I do the same amount of time, but I get paid twice as much, dude, maybe she'll let you close next year." What a dick. I try not to be petty when it comes to stuff like that and of course jealously gets one nowhere, but this guy's just a flat out chode. I agreed with him that it was odd and walked away. It wasn't worth it to retaliate, why stoop to his level? I waited around for a few hours, bought some candy, the crowd seldom paid attention to any of the comics. At one point a water-gun fight broke out. Later, a couple started making out near the stage and the dude went right up the girl's shirt in front of everybody. At about 3:45 I started to get closer to the stage. Just then I noticed my parents had arrived. "We saw this in the paper, saw you were on it, thought we'd get out of town for an afternoon, how's it going?" "Eh, to be honest, I'm not looking forward to this, sometimes it really feels like a job, this is one of those times." "When are you going on?" "4." Brief moment of silence.
Then my dad piped up, "wow, it's pathetic you're not closing this shit." "What?" "Seriously, that guy (comic I don't like) is a total hack, I'm pretty sure he stole his closer from CK, he sucks." "I agree." "Yet he's closing the show and you're not. Seriously, it's pathetic." "It's one booker's opinion." "It's pretty sad Ron, we need to get going actually, we're going to miss your set." "You just got here." "Yeah, I forgot we have stuff to do." Unbelievable. So what if one booker thinks I shouldn't be closing the show? I can't let this crap get to me, especially not now. As I'm trapped in thought I get a tap on the shoulder, it's the MC, "hey man, I need your intro." I looked towards the stage and the comedian on stage was humping the stole with three people watching and laughing and applauding and the rest of the audience still had their backs turned.
I woke up. I was thirsty. Yup, friends, it was a dream. There is no subway in or around Pittsburgh, that's the kicker. Not to mention I don't think either of my parents are familiar with the term "closing" in terms of it being used as comedy-lingo near synonymous but not quite with "headlining." Although, to all my comedy friends out there, I'm a bit disturbed at how possible that dream could actually be. Oh, and neither the comic I didn't like nor the booker were actual people, all sole residents of my subconscious, though I guess if they were people I probably wouldn't divulge their identity anyway. If you need me I'll be at the park doing 90 minutes of crowd work.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
On the Holiday Billboards
In New Jersey the American Atheists posted a billboard in regards to the holidays that had the words "You KNOW it's a myth" with a nativity scene underneath. David Silverman, president of the group has received some coverage on the issue and I wanted to find the most entertaining interview of them all so I looked no further than Faux News. See said interview here:
http://www.theatlanticwire.com/opinions/view/opinion/Atheist-Billboard-on-Nativity-Scene-You-Know-Its-a-Myth-5979
Puppet-talker Megyn Kelly wanted to know why the billboard had to be so confrontational, which she exemplified by beginning her interview with, "way to ruin Christmas, Dave." Passive.
Honestly, I think the billboard is a bit on the obnoxious side, you know what else I found obnoxious? The hotel desk clerk in West Virginia last year that when I wished her Happy Holidays glared back at me and threateningly wished me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Same with the Catholic League that put up an opposing billboard and then insisted on wishing David Silverman a Merry Christmas.
Now, I find myself in a nice position here as I have friends and family that range from Priests to devout Atheists and everything in between. I don't think any more or less of any of them because of their beliefs one way or another because I know their character and that's what matters to me. That being said I get to play spectator and enjoy Church-members getting upset about something they shouldn't give a shit about, and an Atheist organization that should probably find a better way to spend their budget. Although, I guess they can't take the money with 'em. And I really enjoy some of the Christians that refer to evolution as a "fairy tale." I want something credible, give me a talking snake damn it!
Lastly, let's not make this about the children, shall we? "I don't want my children seeing this sign calling it a myth, blah, blah, blah," kids see billboards for booze and strip-clubs and casinos all the time, it's life. Seeing a billboard from someone with an opposing view-point shouldn't be feared, hell, it should be embraced. Learning that not everybody is like you is a valuable lesson to learn, or parents, spin it to your advantage. David Silverman is really Santa's elf and he's testing all the boys and girls who don't believe in Jesus. If you close your eyes and say "I do believe" every time you pass that billboard you're going to get that over-priced crappy toy you won't give two shits about next year. You're welcome Christian parents.
Morons have all kinds of different religious beliefs, even non-existent ones. There's morons on the left, morons on the right, and plenty o' morons in the center. This moron would like to wish all of you a Happy Holiday Season.
http://www.theatlanticwire.com/opinions/view/opinion/Atheist-Billboard-on-Nativity-Scene-You-Know-Its-a-Myth-5979
Puppet-talker Megyn Kelly wanted to know why the billboard had to be so confrontational, which she exemplified by beginning her interview with, "way to ruin Christmas, Dave." Passive.
Honestly, I think the billboard is a bit on the obnoxious side, you know what else I found obnoxious? The hotel desk clerk in West Virginia last year that when I wished her Happy Holidays glared back at me and threateningly wished me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Same with the Catholic League that put up an opposing billboard and then insisted on wishing David Silverman a Merry Christmas.
Now, I find myself in a nice position here as I have friends and family that range from Priests to devout Atheists and everything in between. I don't think any more or less of any of them because of their beliefs one way or another because I know their character and that's what matters to me. That being said I get to play spectator and enjoy Church-members getting upset about something they shouldn't give a shit about, and an Atheist organization that should probably find a better way to spend their budget. Although, I guess they can't take the money with 'em. And I really enjoy some of the Christians that refer to evolution as a "fairy tale." I want something credible, give me a talking snake damn it!
Lastly, let's not make this about the children, shall we? "I don't want my children seeing this sign calling it a myth, blah, blah, blah," kids see billboards for booze and strip-clubs and casinos all the time, it's life. Seeing a billboard from someone with an opposing view-point shouldn't be feared, hell, it should be embraced. Learning that not everybody is like you is a valuable lesson to learn, or parents, spin it to your advantage. David Silverman is really Santa's elf and he's testing all the boys and girls who don't believe in Jesus. If you close your eyes and say "I do believe" every time you pass that billboard you're going to get that over-priced crappy toy you won't give two shits about next year. You're welcome Christian parents.
Morons have all kinds of different religious beliefs, even non-existent ones. There's morons on the left, morons on the right, and plenty o' morons in the center. This moron would like to wish all of you a Happy Holiday Season.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
10 KFC Tweets for the Prize
First we had those artery-clogging food bowls, then we had two pieces of fried chicken substituting a bun, it seemed there were no more possible ways for Kentucky Fried Chicken to declare to the world:
“Humanity, we think you’re going down the toilet, and we may as well capitalize on it!”
But now, KFC is offering a $20,000 scholarship for the student with the best “tweet.” That’s right, scholarships in the past have been awarded on various merits such as stellar grades for four years, an essay possessing an advanced understanding on a certain topic, music or athletic ability honed from years of hard work and effort, or in some cases being left-handed and wanting to study accounting, but with KFC, all it takes is a sentence.
One sentence and likely procrastination on a social network. If that doesn’t encourage scholarly excellence, I don’t know what does. Still, while I’m not sure if graduate students qualify or not, I could use an extra 20K. Here’s 10 tweets in an attempt to chase the prize:
I ate your macaroni and cheese once, had the squirts for a week but still passed a final #KFCscholar
I wore a Colonel Sanders tie to prom #KFCscholar
What you call creativity I call playing with your food #KFCscholar
Even as a little kid I knew which state you guys started in #KFCscholar
Because I happen to collect undernourished chickens that can be yours if…#KFCscholar
Because I can taste the difference between you guys and a Hungry Man #KFCscholar
Because the combination-Pizza-Hut-Taco-Bell song is always first on my iPod playlist #KFCscholar
Because I always remembered to pick up something for the dog, pay it forward! #KFCscholar
Because I can write more than 140 characters #KFCscholar
Because my dietary choices are well-informed enough to never eat your product #KFCscholar
“Humanity, we think you’re going down the toilet, and we may as well capitalize on it!”
But now, KFC is offering a $20,000 scholarship for the student with the best “tweet.” That’s right, scholarships in the past have been awarded on various merits such as stellar grades for four years, an essay possessing an advanced understanding on a certain topic, music or athletic ability honed from years of hard work and effort, or in some cases being left-handed and wanting to study accounting, but with KFC, all it takes is a sentence.
One sentence and likely procrastination on a social network. If that doesn’t encourage scholarly excellence, I don’t know what does. Still, while I’m not sure if graduate students qualify or not, I could use an extra 20K. Here’s 10 tweets in an attempt to chase the prize:
I ate your macaroni and cheese once, had the squirts for a week but still passed a final #KFCscholar
I wore a Colonel Sanders tie to prom #KFCscholar
What you call creativity I call playing with your food #KFCscholar
Even as a little kid I knew which state you guys started in #KFCscholar
Because I happen to collect undernourished chickens that can be yours if…#KFCscholar
Because I can taste the difference between you guys and a Hungry Man #KFCscholar
Because the combination-Pizza-Hut-Taco-Bell song is always first on my iPod playlist #KFCscholar
Because I always remembered to pick up something for the dog, pay it forward! #KFCscholar
Because I can write more than 140 characters #KFCscholar
Because my dietary choices are well-informed enough to never eat your product #KFCscholar
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Report on the Rally for Sanity
The last 48, or wait, has it been 72 hours? Since Thursday night at around 10:30...it's Sunday now...and I need to find a place to go later so I don't have to give children any candy. Ok, now that I've established time and place, I had a great time during the Rally for Sanity weekend, I say weekend because there were events the night before, I was lucky enough to be a part of one of them, but, I'll start chronologically.
Thursday night, I came home around 10:30ish to discover that my cat Lucy had been acting odd all day, she used the bathroom in the tub which is very unlike her, and her urine was discolored. My girlfriend said it was likely a UTI. Agreeing that this shouldn't wait until after the weekend we took her to a 24-hour Pet Hospital in Castle Shannon. The Vet was able to see her relatively quickly and we collected a urine sample for him to make diagnosis easier. We explained our situation that we were heading out of town to DC and would be back Sunday. She did in fact have a UTI, the Vet gave her a shot and a pill that we had to give her orally. He told us to give one to her on Friday, then resume the dosage on Sunday when we got back. He wasn't too thrilled that we'd be skipping a day which made me a bit nervous. So anyway, Lucy was pretty traumatized as she is not one for vets, she hissed and screamed like a banshee the entire time and was pretty ticked in the car too. When we got home she was tired and aloof likely due to the shot and all the action she had been through. I've concluded that Lucy is not a huge fan of authority, she's a loving cat in any situation except Vets and she wasn't a huge fan of airplane security either. I always thought if she was human she'd be an Audrey Lorde type.
Anyway, we got home late Thursday night and decided to pack in the morning and were exhausted blah blah blah.
The next evening I performed at the DC Arts Center for a pre-rally Political Comedy show/party. I had the most fun I've had at a show in awhile. There was a great line-up including Lizz Winstead (Co-Creator of the Daily Show), John Marshall (Writer for Chris Rock and more), Jeff Kreisler (MSNBC, Bill Hicks' Spirit Award) and a bunch of others that were radio personalities, comedians, and even some pundit professors. It was inspiring and humbling to share the stage with so many diversely talented and accomplished people that all came together for a pre-rally show! Crowd was great too, the show went over 2 hours and the energy seldom if ever withered.
Between post-show chatting and traffic I didn't get back to the place I was staying until around 3am, fueled by post-show enthusiasm it took me a bit to get to sleep and a few hours later it was time to get ready for the Rally. I brushed my teeth, splashed some water on me (GROSS!) and headed out with the group. We had VIP passes which meant we could get closer to the front and didn't have to be amassed in quite as many people.
The Rally was packed, with many different groups represented including Marijuana Law Reform activists, Media Matters, Free Press, and people that were just plain fed up with the insanity. I won't get too far into describing the event because I'm sure the blogosphere is already flooded with reports and I'm sure Faux News already reported accurate accounts of the turnout (there were 20 people there).
I'll point out two things, one not-so-good, and one good.
First, one of the guest performers, described by Stewart as a brilliant song-writer, brilliant performer, he's here to premier a new song, I had to convince him to come here... (Holy shit, this is it, the Boss, right?)
...(Maybe Willie Nelson?)
...Ladies and Gentlemen...(this is gonna be good!)
...please welcome, KID ROCK!
...? What?!?!
If you were watching the event on TV and heard what sounded like a thud at that very moment it was the adrenaline of thousands of enthusiastic rally attendees falling through the floor that were expecting a new political song from Bruce and instead got Kid Rock. I'm not even pushing my own taste here, because I was far from alone in this sentiment. Kid Rock got a less-than-enthusiastic response as I personally had to struggle to hear the applause after his song, and what I could make out sounded little more than a courtesy clap from a few that probably felt guilty, considering how many people were there that's not too impressive. The seven-year-old girl they brought up doubled the response he got, I'm pretty sure a stranger could've went up on stage and farted on a snare drum and would've gotten about the same response as Kid Rock. In fairness, when people are expecting Bruce Springsteen that's tough too live up to, still, we got Kid Rock. We were hoping for Filet Mignon, and we didn't even get a Big Mac, we didn't even get a sloppy joe, we got, like, dog food.
Anyway, that was the only disappointment, the other part I'd like to highlight was the very end.
I've often felt, and I could be totally wrong, but one of the reasons Jon Stewart is where he's at, and I'm sure there are many, is because of his ability to break that fourth wall and go from comedian/pundit to citizen, when appropriate. I've felt that way even before I did comedy, and now that I do comedy I find it that much more impressive. In the end Stewart crossed that line to an extent I've never seen since Crossfire in 2004. He even acknowledged it at the beginning, quipping that he knows there's only so far a comedian can go and he'd probably hear about it tomorrow. Like any rally, he summed up the intention of the event, the call to pursue sanity, I personally really enjoyed the simile of the media being like a magnifying glass, it can highlight our problems so we can solve them, or it can burn ants.
Anyway, that's my two cents I feel is worth sharing, again I could've given a play-by-play, but I'm sure there's plenty of that on the web already and better accounts than I would've been able to give anyway. After the rally we were exhausted and decided to head back to Pittsburgh early. Lucy didn't miss a day of medication that way. Right now, she's pretty much back to herself, though she's not a big fan of the pills, beats a shot I'm sure. I've got Misfits to listen to, then I've got work to do, then I've got to get depressed about the fact that I used to celebrate Halloween for a month and I haven't even dressed up in three years, then I've got football to watch. Happy Halloween.
Thursday night, I came home around 10:30ish to discover that my cat Lucy had been acting odd all day, she used the bathroom in the tub which is very unlike her, and her urine was discolored. My girlfriend said it was likely a UTI. Agreeing that this shouldn't wait until after the weekend we took her to a 24-hour Pet Hospital in Castle Shannon. The Vet was able to see her relatively quickly and we collected a urine sample for him to make diagnosis easier. We explained our situation that we were heading out of town to DC and would be back Sunday. She did in fact have a UTI, the Vet gave her a shot and a pill that we had to give her orally. He told us to give one to her on Friday, then resume the dosage on Sunday when we got back. He wasn't too thrilled that we'd be skipping a day which made me a bit nervous. So anyway, Lucy was pretty traumatized as she is not one for vets, she hissed and screamed like a banshee the entire time and was pretty ticked in the car too. When we got home she was tired and aloof likely due to the shot and all the action she had been through. I've concluded that Lucy is not a huge fan of authority, she's a loving cat in any situation except Vets and she wasn't a huge fan of airplane security either. I always thought if she was human she'd be an Audrey Lorde type.
Anyway, we got home late Thursday night and decided to pack in the morning and were exhausted blah blah blah.
The next evening I performed at the DC Arts Center for a pre-rally Political Comedy show/party. I had the most fun I've had at a show in awhile. There was a great line-up including Lizz Winstead (Co-Creator of the Daily Show), John Marshall (Writer for Chris Rock and more), Jeff Kreisler (MSNBC, Bill Hicks' Spirit Award) and a bunch of others that were radio personalities, comedians, and even some pundit professors. It was inspiring and humbling to share the stage with so many diversely talented and accomplished people that all came together for a pre-rally show! Crowd was great too, the show went over 2 hours and the energy seldom if ever withered.
Between post-show chatting and traffic I didn't get back to the place I was staying until around 3am, fueled by post-show enthusiasm it took me a bit to get to sleep and a few hours later it was time to get ready for the Rally. I brushed my teeth, splashed some water on me (GROSS!) and headed out with the group. We had VIP passes which meant we could get closer to the front and didn't have to be amassed in quite as many people.
The Rally was packed, with many different groups represented including Marijuana Law Reform activists, Media Matters, Free Press, and people that were just plain fed up with the insanity. I won't get too far into describing the event because I'm sure the blogosphere is already flooded with reports and I'm sure Faux News already reported accurate accounts of the turnout (there were 20 people there).
I'll point out two things, one not-so-good, and one good.
First, one of the guest performers, described by Stewart as a brilliant song-writer, brilliant performer, he's here to premier a new song, I had to convince him to come here... (Holy shit, this is it, the Boss, right?)
...(Maybe Willie Nelson?)
...Ladies and Gentlemen...(this is gonna be good!)
...please welcome, KID ROCK!
...? What?!?!
If you were watching the event on TV and heard what sounded like a thud at that very moment it was the adrenaline of thousands of enthusiastic rally attendees falling through the floor that were expecting a new political song from Bruce and instead got Kid Rock. I'm not even pushing my own taste here, because I was far from alone in this sentiment. Kid Rock got a less-than-enthusiastic response as I personally had to struggle to hear the applause after his song, and what I could make out sounded little more than a courtesy clap from a few that probably felt guilty, considering how many people were there that's not too impressive. The seven-year-old girl they brought up doubled the response he got, I'm pretty sure a stranger could've went up on stage and farted on a snare drum and would've gotten about the same response as Kid Rock. In fairness, when people are expecting Bruce Springsteen that's tough too live up to, still, we got Kid Rock. We were hoping for Filet Mignon, and we didn't even get a Big Mac, we didn't even get a sloppy joe, we got, like, dog food.
Anyway, that was the only disappointment, the other part I'd like to highlight was the very end.
I've often felt, and I could be totally wrong, but one of the reasons Jon Stewart is where he's at, and I'm sure there are many, is because of his ability to break that fourth wall and go from comedian/pundit to citizen, when appropriate. I've felt that way even before I did comedy, and now that I do comedy I find it that much more impressive. In the end Stewart crossed that line to an extent I've never seen since Crossfire in 2004. He even acknowledged it at the beginning, quipping that he knows there's only so far a comedian can go and he'd probably hear about it tomorrow. Like any rally, he summed up the intention of the event, the call to pursue sanity, I personally really enjoyed the simile of the media being like a magnifying glass, it can highlight our problems so we can solve them, or it can burn ants.
Anyway, that's my two cents I feel is worth sharing, again I could've given a play-by-play, but I'm sure there's plenty of that on the web already and better accounts than I would've been able to give anyway. After the rally we were exhausted and decided to head back to Pittsburgh early. Lucy didn't miss a day of medication that way. Right now, she's pretty much back to herself, though she's not a big fan of the pills, beats a shot I'm sure. I've got Misfits to listen to, then I've got work to do, then I've got to get depressed about the fact that I used to celebrate Halloween for a month and I haven't even dressed up in three years, then I've got football to watch. Happy Halloween.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Open Letter that Should be Sent
Dear Facebook, Thank you for giving me something to blame procrastination on.
Dear Procrastination, I blame Facebook.
Dear Christine O'Donnell, Wow. Here's to at least a month or so of lazy punchlines, surely I'll find myself among the guilty party.
Dear Jethro Tull, Please tour with Spirit of the West, that would be super amazing.
Dear Tea Party, Legit grassroots movements aren't funded by billionaires, just sayin'.
Dear Morrissey, Not cool dude.
Dear ICP, I'm no theologian, but I can't find "we've got great shirts for bitches" in the bible anywhere.
Dear "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," Go away. Please.
Dear Joe Biden, Do something.
Dear Marcellus Shale, Thanks alot, now all of the rural land in Pennsylvania can be the same quality as the roads.
Dear Person who's not sure if that last one was pro or con, Drive in Pennsylvania sometime.
Last but certainly not least,
Dear BLOOMINGTON, INDIANA, SEE YOU SATURDAY, 10/16!!!
Dear Procrastination, I blame Facebook.
Dear Christine O'Donnell, Wow. Here's to at least a month or so of lazy punchlines, surely I'll find myself among the guilty party.
Dear Jethro Tull, Please tour with Spirit of the West, that would be super amazing.
Dear Tea Party, Legit grassroots movements aren't funded by billionaires, just sayin'.
Dear Morrissey, Not cool dude.
Dear ICP, I'm no theologian, but I can't find "we've got great shirts for bitches" in the bible anywhere.
Dear "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," Go away. Please.
Dear Joe Biden, Do something.
Dear Marcellus Shale, Thanks alot, now all of the rural land in Pennsylvania can be the same quality as the roads.
Dear Person who's not sure if that last one was pro or con, Drive in Pennsylvania sometime.
Last but certainly not least,
Dear BLOOMINGTON, INDIANA, SEE YOU SATURDAY, 10/16!!!
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