The other day I was walking around and I saw a guy on a bicycle, he had a giant hiker's backpack on, which I'm assuming contained all of his possessions, and he had a tiny boom-box across his handle bars...blaring the theme from Top Gun.
I stared upon this brilliant rider with the utmost envy (which may or may not say something about how content I am these days). Nonetheless, here's a dude that had the world by the balls. Peddling like a champ, going against the wind as if to say "what's next America? What else do you got? I bet half these people have office jobs that they hate that they don't have the gull to quit, I'm beating those minions damn it! People do crazy things for the illusion of safety...they'll forfeit civil liberties, stay at a job they hate, move to the suburbs of a city that's boring to begin with, join a cult, join a religion...and I don't even have a helmet on!"
There rode by a dude I wanted to have a beer with. That guy had shit figured out.
When Antisthenes got in trouble for jerking off in public he simply responded, "I only wish rubbing my belly would have the same effect in getting rid of hunger." I'm paraphrasing, but that's hysterical.
Dear Corporate-Media-Cherry-Picked American Populace, Why weren't you so concerned about costs when the last dude was sending us to war? That shit's expensive too ya know.
Dear Joe Biden, I'm glad you dropped the f-bomb, I wish that was the only bomb you or any other world leader would ever be allowed to drop.
Dear Ann Coulter, People have the right to protest, it happens. The First Amendment goes both ways. Instead of making your speech anyway, you went for the publicity stunt and tried to play the victim. I don't know what that's all a-boot, but you don't expect people to fall for that, eh?
Sometimes, you just gotta ride a bike with a boom-box and rub one out on the neighbor's driveway.